THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW BEFORE COMING TO THE GOLD COAST.

 

The Gold Coast Queensland is a great place to see the sun, surf and get sand between your toes.. But...!

1.    The car indicator was invented around 1914. Believe it or not.. ALL cars have them. Yes even your hire car. USE THEM. We don't have mind reading skills.
 

2.    The Gold Coast is extremely well signed. You wanna go to the theme parks.. Follow the brown signs.
 

3.    Don't just change lanes and cut in front of other cars to get to the off ramp. Go to the next one.. They all link up at some point. 
 

4.    Don't give us the finger if we beep our horn at your erratic driving. Eyes on the road Rhonda.
 

5.    We NEVER go into Surfers Paradise. It a shithole. It's dirty and well just eww.
Unless you're a 20 something and want to go clubbing or to the strippers then it's around 10pm.
If you are old and have a bit of class - go to Broadbeach.
 

6.    DON’T SPIT!! Spitting is absolutely disgusting. Hocking up a gorby and spitting it on our beautiful beaches is a HUGE NO NO!!
 

7.    Yes we have shark nets. Yes they entangle whales and other marine life. They are here for your safety. Not ours.  No the council won't remove them.. They are jerks.
 

8.    Swim between the red and yellow flags. Again this is for YOUR safety.
 

9.    Go and see the Pelicans being fed at Charis.. DON’T chase after them for a selfie. They are there to be fed. Not touched. You ruin everyone else's experience if your kids scare them away. Sit on the steps.. They'll come very close.
 

10.  The Gold Coast has pubs everywhere. If you drink a certain drink all the time - order it. Don't just ask for a beer. Or you'll get a schooner of Gold.
 

11.  Don't feed the Ibis! this is the vermin of the bird world.
 

12.  There are plenty of Lamborghinis and Ferraris around. So we don't get excited to see these and overpriced stock standard Mercedes drive past. 
Unless you're at a car show.. Don't take photos of people's cars. They'll think you're going to steal it.
However if it's a done up hot rod or a restored classic... Snap away.
 

13.  Boobs!! Boobs are everywhere. Most of them are bought. Yes we all notice them. Don't stare it's rude.
 

14.  If you don't want your shit stolen.. Don't leave your valuables in your car. People are jerks and stalk theme park car parks for stuff in full view.
 

15.  Ask nicely if you want us to take a photo of you. We'll also probably take a selfie without you knowing lol
 

16.  SAY PLEASE AND THANK YOU!!!
 

17.  Parking is utter crap on the Gold Coast. Be prepared to drive around and around until you can finally park. You'll most likely have to walk a distance to get somewhere. And parking inspectors are EVERYWHERE.
 

18.  It's hot here. All the time. Don't bring winter clothes.
Brisbane floods and up north has cyclones. We don't.
If by the odd chance it gets below 20'c  and you start to freeze. Buy a jacket.
 

19.  Pre buy your theme park tickets. You'll save $100s
 

20.  During school holidays be prepared to wait hours in lines at the theme parks. You're not the only one who thought of holidaying here.

 

21.  We have the same shops as you do. Unless you go to Harbourtown.. The prices are still the same price. Even at Harbs.. You’ll think you’re getting a good price – but really it’s the same amount.

 

22.  Don’t go to Carrara markets. It’s an oversized garage sale and you’ll leave without buying a single thing. We go once a year to remind us how crap it really is. Go to the Farmers Markets and night markets for crafty stuff and things you can’t just buy cheaper off eBay.

 

23.  You don’t need to wear “bum bags” “fanny packs” or hidden money wallets. We probably have more moola than you anyway.

 

24.  Get in your car and go for a drive. Don’t just hang around Surfers. Head up to Tambo or O'Reilly's for a nice day trip. Down Currumbin way for the beautiful beaches.

 

25.  Take lots of photos.. But put the camera down and enjoy your surroundings.

 

26.  You don’t need to yell. Talk normally. Standard tone and remember your “indoor” voice when on the phone.

 

27.  Scooter & beeping. This is NOT funny! If we could push you into oncoming traffic – we would. There is no need to ride your lazy ass around beeping the horn for shits n giggles. So don’t.



28. Repeat Number 16!

29. You don't need to say hello to everyone. We know you're a tourist. Just a friendly smile is enough :)



30. Have a wonderful time. Just be normal and we'll welcome you back anytime



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